Philosophy is a very interesting class to be taking. At first, I thought, "Why the heck am I taking this?" Then it moved into, "This is going to be pretty fun actually!" After that it was, "My professor teaches pole dancing classes!!" and from that point on, it has been, "Ehh. I don't really have to read..."
I think there are a variety of people in every college class. People with different beliefs and home lifes. In Philosophy, though, we actually talk about what our differences are.
Recently we had to turn in papers about our perception of God or if God exists. It was seriously SO hard for me to write, because I've never really had to put that into words (which shows the extent of my conversations with people). I felt like an elementary school kid writing their first paper, because the quality of my writing was just that awful. At least I got it over with though.
My professor always loves everything that everybody does or says, so she wanted us to read our papers to the class. When no one volunteered, she decided that she would take excerpts out of all of our papers and have everyone read a random one.
As more and more paragraphs were being read, I started to become more and more depressed. When I looked around the room, I figured there were three, maybe four people who believed anything close to what I believe. One guy at the end observed, "I think most people aren't set in their beliefs. Most of us have some idea, but we're aware that there is no way of knowing what the truth is." I could not even fathom what he was saying. I know EXACTLY who and what the truth is.
This little exercise hurt my heart. It made me realize how many lost people are in the world... even at my school. I can't imagine not knowing. One of the papers said, "I believe we live to be happy." I agree with that to some extent. I do very much enjoy being happy. But how the HECK do you have happiness if you don't have God? How can you be okay with thinking that when you die, you're just done? How can you have no hope? Also, the Bible does say that there is a time for everything.
I so wish that I could explain my opinions about God better. I wish I even knew all of my opinions about God. I think that's why it scares me a little to talk about it with other people. What if they ask me a question that I don't know the answer to?
I've always believed that it is best for people to know I'm a Christian and then see how I act. If anything about religion or politics came up that I didn't agree with, I would just keep my mouth shut, and "respect the other person's opinions". I think I'm realizing more now, though, that I need to be more bold. I can still respect other people's opinions while sharing my own. How do I expect to grow in my faith if I stay in my comfort zone of staying silent when anything controversial comes up?
The thought of going to a Christian school has been very appealing to me. There wouldn't be as much cussing, I would grow in my faith, and I could definitely get along with more people. However; I feel blessed to be going somewhere where people are lost. I know that I am where I should be right now, and let me tell you, it's a great feeling. I don't know how I want to do it, but I do want to show people how great it is to be a believer.
So, I guess this will be my prayer for a while. That I can figure out how to show people God's love in different ways. I need to branch out and talk to people that I normally wouldn't. I just watched a documentary called "Beware of Christians" (btw totally recommend it). In it, they made a good point saying that we need to become friends with people in poverty. I.e. don't just give a homeless person money, but invite them to go eat with you. If we become friends with these people, their problems will become our problems. Thus meaning that we have a greater desire to help them and show them the Way, the Truth, and the Light.
I suppose that's all I have to say for now. I should definitely be doing math homework, but... this was... more important? Yeah. It was. :)